The chronicles of a PK

  I know this isn’t a new conversation. It’s been discussed coast to coast, in countless podcasts and articles. But I think it’s worth saying again—especially for those of us who grew up in the church and have seen both sides up close. There’s a difference between good pastors and bad ones. Between shepherds who care for people and leaders who use faith as a tool to control, manipulate, or enrich themselves. The hard truth is this: some of the worst damage done in the name of Christ has been done by people with microphones and pulpits. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a megachurch with a massive budget or a tiny congregation with twenty folding chairs—this sickness can grow anywhere. I’ve watched it happen over and over: Leaders who turn Christ’s message into an endless sin-management quest, where you’re never quite clean enough, never quite obedient enough, never quite forgiven. Preachers who measure success by tithes and attendance, not by how well they care for the peo...

  One of the most damaging lies mothers are told—especially in the church—is that we must disappear to prove our love. Growing up as a preacher’s kid, I didn’t always hear this message spoken outright. But it was there, woven through every sermon about “biblical womanhood,” every lesson about submission and sacrifice, every passing comment about what girls should want. I was being raised to believe that the highest calling a woman could ever have was to become a wife and mother—and that anything outside of that was, at best, a distraction, and at worst, rebellion. It wasn’t just me. I’ve watched so many women come out of conservative, religious homeschool environments where this mindset was even more explicit. Girls weren’t simply encouraged to value family—they were groomed to see motherhood as the only acceptable ambition. Careers were suspect. Education was optional. Independence was dangerous. And if you dared to want something more—to travel, to learn, to build somethi...

  I wasn’t planning to write another post so soon, but sometimes you come across something that just won’t leave you alone. Today, I watched a TikTok about how churches will spend millions of dollars on buildings, sound systems, and programs to keep people entertained—but almost nothing to actually help the poor. I’ve been thinking about this all day. One of the very first commands of Jesus is to love your neighbor as yourself. Not to build empires in His name. Not to build bigger stages. Just love people—really, practically, sacrificially. But somewhere along the way, the church started believing the best way to “love” people was to invite them to a performance. A performance that often has very little to do with meeting their real needs. Here’s the truth: people can’t hear a sermon over the growling in their stomach. They can’t care about your Sunday production if they have nowhere safe to sleep on Monday. And it’s not like this is some new psychological discovery. Ma...